Are Closeted Gay Husbands Misogynistic?
Misogyny (/mɪˈsɒdʒɪni/) is the hatred or dislike of women or girls. Misogyny can be manifested in many ways, including sexual discrimination, denigration of women, violence against women, and sexual objectification of women.
My answer to the question are closeted gay husbands misogynistic is yes. I cannot say that all closeted gay men share a hatred toward women. I am speaking from experience. I spent twenty-two years with a closeted gay husband. Are you being set up, so he can tear you down? Is is calling you names like bitch, whore, slut etc.? My gay ex never missed what he felt was an opportunity to inflict damage. It was like he was throwing up, spewing all his hate, and he felt relief afterwards. Yes relief for himself at my expense.
There is a certain scenario, one that was not easy to understand. I did not understand this until my marriage ended. There were times my husband had a lot of rage, and jealousy. It never felt like this was about me. I never flattered myself to think, he loves me so much he cannot stand the thought of sharing me with another man. He was not jealous of every man who talked to me, or gave me a certain look, just certain men. He became physically violent over a coworker who said very few words to me. I did not understand his level of violence under any circumstances, much less over something so minor. The man and I barely spoke. I left my husband for six months after this. When I packed my things to leave he cried. He told me I was his best friend, his only friend. I felt very sorry for him as I was leaving, but did not want to stay with someone who could inflict such physical and emotional pain. I left him and moved from Florida to Texas. Putting seven hundred miles between us, I did not believe I would be returning. The six months we spent apart, he worked on me, begging me to come back. I did end up going back and staying twenty more years.
So what was all this jealousy about? Like I said it was only over certain men. I now believe the jealousy was over men he himself desired. I believe the closeted gay husband in certain situations becomes competitive with his wife over attention from men. It’s much like competition between women. I believe the closeted gay husband plays up the best friend scenario. I heard I was his best friend so many times, I really did believe it. All they really have to offer you in the marriage is friendship. They play on your sympathy, on your good heart. They are jealous of your good nature, and your ability to connect with, and attract people. When their jealousy leads to violence, when it becomes physically, or emotionally abusive then this is hate toward a woman.
I can say that a man who uses a woman to cover the fact that he is gay, one who berates, and tears her down, one who physically abuses women, and calls her obscene names is misogynistic. If you are objectified in any way, then you might be dealing with a misogynistic closeted gay husband. If you have suspicions that your husband is gay pay attention to behavior that does not add up. I remembered every odd behavior that did not make sense to me, they were all pieces of a puzzle. It took years for me to put all the pieces together.